ORLANDO CHINESE CHURCH MONTHLY NEWSLETTER
MAY, 2002
Dear Daughter
I still remember that bright early morning last year when J called to ask for our permission to propose to you later that day. In the evening you called to tell us the good news of your engagement. From that time on, even till now, every bit of your growing-up from birth, walking, piano lessons, first day of school…..has been coming back to piece my mind here and there throughout the days. I am fully aware of my own shortcomings in raising up you and your brother, because of my lack of experience. But God has faithfully kept and cared for you in all things. So often we thank God for giving you to us, for sharing with us the joy of your growth in this house. We count you as our God-given joy and comfort, for which we worship Him.
You and J have been dating for seven years, during which time not without few valleys. To come to this decision of marriage, it must be the result of earnest prayers, deep considerations in addition to emotional affection. Soon you will be our June bride, taking on a new role other than a daughter or a sister with a brand new life ahead of you. Before this, you have enjoyed nearly ten years of a simple and easy living of a single person. While still enjoying your engagement ring, you may not yet fully appreciate the meaning of having an added person in your life. You are an organized person, love to be clean and fashion after your brother in many things to be his equal. Now as you choose marriage with J, you need to learn to accept him as your husband. Marriage is one thing in life that can only be either/or. You have prayed for this the longest time, now learn to accept God's plan with fear and reverence. In marriage look to God's grace and mercy and depend on His care and guidance always.
You are my daughter, who must have seen clearly my failure and mistakes and known my weakness. One may say, "Well, I'm only human," and forget that we are in fact sinners forgiven. We all need the continuing mercy, deliverance and forgiveness of our heavenly Father. We are the workmanship in His hand. According to His divine will, He will unceasingly mold in us His nature till to His full satisfaction. Furthermore, man is different from woman with his own needs, which we cannot assess with our own standards. If they should become woman, it would just be more trouble and headache for us. Therefore, in accepting J, I hope that you have passed the stage of "blind love" and forget that he is human, who would still make mistakes like everyone else. Accept his weaknesses, knowing that true love requires one to see through all those and still love. Learn to appreciate each other's strength and virtue, while overlook the shortcomings. Even when you discover a new blemish in him, look to God's grace to help him overcome it, even to accept, bear and forgive. This is not going to be easy by any means, but to be learned with the power of God. You need also learn to forgive yourself and ask to be forgiven as quickly as possible. This whole process is a wonderful healing by God, a vital element in marriage.
You are an emotional "people" person, always afraid of being in debt to others but striving for perfection in human relationship. After marriage it will be a big plus if J can understand and support you in this regard. If unfortunately not, learn the beauty of self-control and do not demand your husband to allow you to satisfy all the people relations you have had before marriage. As parents we treasure a close relationship with both of you. But we do not wish this to become a stumbling block in your marriage. Remember "to leave father and mother and to cleave to the mate, two shall become one." Furthermore, he should have his own male companions, with whom he can share and fellowship, just like you need your circle of girl friends. Then you would have them as other channels of support when two of you get into friction and disagreement. This will avoid forcing him to bear all your pressure and annoyances.
Do depend on each other, while maintain independence. You should be different from him in certain ways, with virtues that he would admire and treasure. Being yourself, you can compliment what he lacks. The reverse is equally true. The strength of the other will not be a pressure but a resource in marriage. Encourage each other and grow together in grace. Since you both are sincere believers of Christ, you have the distinct advantage of having Him in your lives to form the third apex of an equal-triangle. With Christ at the top, your distance from each other will be considerably shortened. Draw near to God and your minds will be renewed and refreshed in the process. Gradually you will be even closer to each other, and finally to the full stature of Christ, glory upon glory.
You were trained by your dad to be independent and disciplined. I am not afraid that you be fragile like a tiny leaning flower, but worry that you compromise your position too much because of emotion. This may be the over-concern of a mother, but my prayer is that in the process of "becoming one" you live without doubting or strife. May the Lord grant you wisdom to know how to be treasured by your husband, so he be comforted by your presence in his life. May the Lord keep you to bear all things, believe all things, hope all things and endure all things. Truly love and respect each other, and jointly run the heavenly race with love and service for the Master.
With all my love,
Your dear mother
My Angel
The child asked God, " They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless? "
" Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you. "
The child further inquired, " But tell me, here in heaven I don't havr to do anything but sing and smile to be happy. "
God said, " Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy ."
Again the child asked, " And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language? "
God said, " Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak ." " And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you? "
God said, " Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray. "
" Who will protect me? "
God said, " Your angel will defend you even if it means risking it's life. "
" But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore. "
God said, " Your angel will always talk to you about me and will teach you the way to come back to me, even though I will always be next to you. "
At that moment there was much peace in heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, " God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name. "
You will simply call her " Mom. "