ORLANDO CHINESE CHURCH MONTHLY NEWSLETTER
SEPTEMBER, 2000
The Birth Of The Song
" Precious Lord "(T.A.Dorsey)
Back in 1932 I was 32 years old and a fairly new husband. My wife, Nettie, and I were living in a little apartment on Chicago's Southside. One hot August afternoon I had to go to St. Louis, where I was to be the featured soloist at a large revival meeting.
I didn't want to go. Nettie was in the last month of pregnancy with our first child. But a lot of people were expecting me in St. Louis. I kissed Nettie good-bye, clattered downstairs to our Model A and, in a fresh Lake Michigan breeze, chugged out of Chicago on Route 66.
However, outside the city, I discovered that in my anxiety at leaving, I had forgotten my music case. I wheeled around and headed back. I found Nettie sleeping peacefully. I hesitated by her bed: something was strongly telling me to stay. But eager to get on my way, and not wanting to disturb Nettie, I shrugged off the feeling and quietly slipped out of the room with my music.
The next night in the steaming St. Louis heat, the crowd called on me to sing again and again. When I finally sat down, a messenger boy ran up with a Western Union telegram. I ripped open the envelope. Pasted on the yellow sheet were the words: YOUR WIFE JUST DIED.
People were happily singing and clapping around me, but I could hardly keep from crying out. I rushed to a phone and called home. All I could hear on the other end was "Nettie is dead. Nettie is dead." When I got back, I learned that Nettie had given birth to a boy. I swung between grief and joy. Yet that night, the baby died. I buried Nettie and our little boy, both together, in the same casket. Then I fell apart.
For days I closeted myself. I felt that God had done me an injustice. I didn't want to serve Him any more or write gospel songs. I just wanted to go back to that jazz world I once knew so well. But then, as I hunched alone in that dark apartment those first sad days, I thought back to the afternoon I went to St. Louis. Something kept telling me to stay with Nettie.
Was that something God? Oh, if I had paid more attention to Him that day, I would have stayed and been with Nettie when she died. From that moment on I vowed to listen more closely to Him. But still I was lost in grief.
Everyone was kind to me, especially a friend, Professor Fry, who seemed to know what I need. On the following Saturday evening he took me up to Malone's Poro College, a neighborhood music school. It was quiet: the late evening sun crept through the curtained windows. I sat down at the piano, and my hands began to browse over the keys. Something happened to me then. I felt at peace. I felt as though I could reach out and touch God. I found myself playing a melody, one into my head - they just seemed to fall into place:
As the Lord gave me these words and melody, He also healed my spirit. I learned that when we are in our deepest grief, when we feel farthest from God, this is when He is closest, and when we are most open to His restoring power. And so I go on living for God willingly and joyfully, until that day comes when He will take me and gently lead me home.
Precious Lord, take my hand,
lead me on, let me stand,
I am tired, I am weak, I am worn,
Through the storm, through the night,
lead me on to the light,
Take my hand, precious Lord,
Lead me home.
Sometimes our greatest and most accurate observations about God come in moments of utter despair and desperation, when life seems futile and God seems silent. Such was the case for this author and for the Psalmist. Perhaps this is your experience as well.
God is never gone. He is always present, ready to render aid to those who will seek and accept His type of help. Our problem, perhaps, is that when we are out of options with only one hope left - God, we seem to tell him exactly how He should get us out of the mess we got ourselves into. We need to let God be God. Let Him, from His eternal perspective and heavenly vantage, choose the solution to our woes. He will never let you down or leave you.
Remember the poem "Foot Print"? when you see only a pair of footprints in the sand, don't assume that they are yours. In fact, at the times you called out to God and let Him help you, those footprints are the Lord's as He carries you.
I pray that you will be blessed. Reach out to someone in pain or sorrow. Let them know how very much our Lord loves them. Be a visible reminder of the compassion and mercy that God has for us.
When affliction Strikes Others
A brother in Christ lost his only son in a car crash. Despite the stress and agony, he still had to face the critic from the "Job's friends" saying that, "you must have sinned against God, that's why it results in such consequences." They insisted that he must confess his sins and repent.
Some time ago, my son's good friend Jammie brought his wife and family to visit Orlando. He is a young pastor and has two daughters. Due to the rare phenomenon that the blood type of the baby conflicted with that of the mother during pregnancy, the baby's brain was not fully developed. After tremendous amount of prayers, Jammie and his wife decided to preserve the little life. Now this baby is about one year old. Her beautiful blue eyes are actually blind. She even needs to be fed through tubes since she can't swallow baby food. She cries often because of gastritis. Seeing their exhaustion while they were in our house, we just prayed with them, asking the Lord to show mercy and give them strength to go on. Jammie shared with me that the weariness of the body was not a big deal. The toughest thing was that many had determined he had some hidden sins. The tormented heart at times felt that the road was far too long and too hard. "If it was not for prayers of God's comfort, there is no way we are able to go on."
When the suffering falls upon others, do we know how to use God's comfort to encourage them? Can we lift up our friends to God, urge them to lean on the grace of God through the affliction, and let the Holy Spirit reveal the Will of God to them?
Professor Christian Chen once pointed out an important lesson from the book of Lamentation chapter 1. In verses 1: 1-11, the prophet described the situation of the fallen Jerusalem due to sins, then Holy Spirit turned from "he" to "I". Verse 12-16: "… Is any suffering like my suffering that was inflicted on me, that the Lord brought on me in the day of His fierce anger? From on high he sent fire, sent it down into my bones… This is why I weep and my eyes overflow with tears…" Why did the Holy Spirit make such a turn here? It's because if the prophet Jeremiah continued to use the word "he" as the main subject, then one essential spiritual principle might have been neglected.
When sufferings fall upon a brother (or a group), only the Holy Spirit can do the explanation regarding the sufferings, not the by-standers. It's because, other than the Holy Spirit Himself, no one else is able to apply his spiritual discernment to interpret such events. This is one of the hardest truth for a believer to grasp. Sometimes due to minor disagreements, we are tempted to think that God has left the other party as they suffer. The prophet Jeremiah dared not deprive God's authority. Therefore, we must be very careful, no matter how much we think we know the Will of God, we can only say we know our portion, and not the portion of others.
In the Old Testament time, people did not comprehend the Will of God, and they had to go to the prophets. Now in the New Testament time, the Holy Spirit resides in us. We receive instructions from the anointing. The important principle is that we must lift up all the interpretations of our encounter into the Holy Spirit's hand. It is essential to remember that since we are not God, we cannot tell others that their suffering is directly related to their sins against the Lord. Especially when a disaster comes upon a brother, we must learn in the love of Christ not to make any attempt to explain things away. We must know that the explanation is in Christ's hand. Christians often commit immoral sin in this area.
There were many kind of sufferings recorded in the Bible. Some were indeed due to sins, but no one should put himself in the Holy seat to rebuke others. Only when the subject himself brings the event before the Lord, the Holy Spirit will open his eyes to see the purpose and the reason behind the sufferings. Only then can this person or group be brought back into the Will of God. When the Holy Spirit does the explanation, the first person is always used, not the third person. No third party can do such explanation. This is the very mistake Job's friends made.
Therefore, when challenges occur, the particular person or group ought to go before the Lord in order to find the purpose behind the sufferings. It is then that this person can learn the spiritual lessons in a positive, not a negative way. We all should learn before the Lord, not to simply condemn people, nor even trying to explain others' situation. The Holy Spirit has never entrusted us the work of explaining. When the Holy Spirit explains, the person then can say, "how I was and how I am", not "how he was and how he is". This is the reason why starting from the verse 1:12 in Lamentation, the Holy Spirit made a turn, from "he" to "I".
That night, late and quiet, after the young mom brought her little one to rest, Jammie said to me, "I know clearly that all my sins had been cleansed by the Lord on the cross. Today what we are facing is by His grace, which is the special training that God has for us, to equip us as father and mother, and as God's servant in Christ."